Normal but meaningfuL

well this is the fourth day of the CNY lioa lu….sigh wat do i felt now? hmm well a wonderful start for me!! yeah!! kinda need that….i need some morale support here from all my frens to continue my meaningless life bah!!! having some difficulty to cope up wateva happened to me lately….!!! hmm guess need to treat it as a big big lesson to me!!! that;s y it changes me alot …from happy to sad, from sad to meaningless now!!!

trying to spice back up my life thou!!! need help from my frens to spice up my life now!!! sigh….wat a new year!!!!!

I have been so damn negative these few months!!!from NO to YES and now to NO again!!!everytime when i faced some problem i will be really really weak!!!i changed alot…from happy go lucky to sad and to happy again n to sad again NOW!!!what got into me? there is alwiz an option in our life and it is all how we chose it!!but…we are all good at tALking but when there is really a prob then we will choose to back off or choose to avoid!!!!

I know i cant said i am the worst person in this world because i know there are alot more little children or maybe ppl who is more unlucky than me….but at the moment, i am so damn confused and so damn sad now because i have faced somethg that i need to be faced alone…alwiz empty and alwiz alone….no1 knows about it!!!!i cant let my family to get to know about it and i cant really let some of my frens to know about it…which is the most suffering part.the most sufferring is when u cant let ppl know the reason why u r suffering and y u r so damn sad about!!!!tat;s y no1 will understand….sigh….wateva it is, it;s my choice….i made an option so i need to live with it or face…jez the matter of choice or i wanna face it or maybe avoid it by goin somewhere far far away!!!! stupid rite? naive rite? toonaive and toostupid to live on in this world with full of lies and cruelness!!!!

SO FACE it or LEAVE it!!!

i thought there will be sunshine for me after some rainy days…but i dunno there is a storm waiting for me…i tried not to be negative…but reality is always cruel!!!! guess i am too naive to live bah!!!i am too childish coz i alwiz have the thinking that ppl wont hurt ppl coz we r all living together in this world…so they wont be hurting us as we r human..but i was really wrong bah!!!!

i was being too naive to live in this cruel world…i dont know i can stand for how long now…coz i really too helpless and lonely now bah!!no frens around…wat a joke coz i have been living in this world for 23 years n now i am telling u all tat i dun even have a fren to be by my side when somethg happen to me? yup this is the truth bah….haha funny rite? i also think that is funny too…i alwiz asked myself whether i treat ppl badly til they dun wan to fren with me? nope…i alwiz treat them with my all heart but then maybe they all tot my request is too much bah…

guess i really too naive n too childish to live….sigh!!! well anyway wish all of u in this world.. all the best bah!!!….bye